Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
foreskin is a definite game changer
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
