"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
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