Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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