porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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