The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
What changed your mind?
Being sober
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize