Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
