everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
this will be a night to untag.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
