accomplished twins. life is a go
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
