Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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