her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
