I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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