you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize