is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
