so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
