sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize