Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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