For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
