you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
