just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
