I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
