Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
