doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize
