you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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