3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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