it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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