the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
