Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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