Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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