me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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