I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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