Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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