i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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