Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
