Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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