I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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