i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize
