I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
