my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
