and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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