I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
you told grandpa to call you daddy
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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