You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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