Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
