ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize