I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
