is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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