There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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