i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
