i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
