I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
