i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
