Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
