I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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