I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize